First of all, I have to say as a gay child growing up in Texas I always wanted to have a super power like Superman, Batman, Flash Gordon or any other super hero. If I had only known as little LGBTQ children that if we had come together we could have solved the problem of drought anywhere in the world. Can you imagine! We could have probably demanded first class treatment as far as hotels and seats on planes with this incredible power. But of course having been born in 1957 we did not have “Little Peoples Gay Pride” in Texas during the 60’s. However, according to Pat Robertson, we still have the power to cause floods in drought ridden areas and now that we know we cause these floods, we could give ample warning to any community to evacuate before the “LGBTQ Rainmakers” descend upon the requested location to bring massive amounts of rainwater to their lands.
I’ve lived my whole life in Texas. I was raised Southern Baptist, although I left the “Your Going to Hell for Being Gay” Southern Baptist faction I grew up attending quite a few years ago (I must admit there are some very good Southern Baptist Christians). Then there are those like Pat Robertson of The 700 Club, Robert Jeffress (First Baptist Dallas Cult Leader) and Joel Olsteen “Mr. Always Late to the Flood Shelter” party offering his church as a shelter only after being called out on his failure to help the people of Houston.
These hypocrites continue to make me nauseous to this day. I went to high school with Robert Jeffress (President of Richardson High School Student Council) who is still more politician than preacher. When these megachurch ministers values are based on worshiping the “Almighty Dollar” and live in multimillion dollar mansions something has gone wrong with their religious core values.
I remember when we moved from Houston to Dallas in 1967 my mother would occasionally watch The 700 Club. My mother was severely bi-polar/manic depressive so she would call the 700 Club’s 800 number making donations in the thousands of dollars on her credit card and then go back to watching Robertson and hear him say something about “wives must be submissive to their husbands” and she would immediately pick up the phone and call, instantly cursing, screaming and ranting at whoever answered the phone telling them they better cancel the charge to her credit card or she would turn them into the police. Usually they would hang up on her before she could finish her wild rant about Pat Robertson and his misogynistic choice of scripture and his condemnation of working wives.
So now with Robertson being 87 years old and still saying a woman’s place is barefoot and pregnant in the home raising 5 children while being submissive to her husband. The same message he has been preaching on The 700 Club for 51 years, it just amazes me his “Evangelical” supporters keep sending him millions of dollars.
But my point today is that Robertson holds my LGBTQ Community in Texas responsible for the flooding of Houston. In 2015 when South Carolina had massive flooding Robertson shared his wisdom from his direct connection with God and the “Robertson Prophecy”.
Below I’m going to insert the major text in an article from October 5th , 2015 on “Church and State” about Robertson’s Podcast “Wake Up With Jesus” while inserting my interpretation in parentheses within the article as how I would translate his story!
WAKE UP WITH JESUS:
Robertson was speaking on his Monday morning podcast, “Wake Up With Jesus,” when a caller asked him if he felt that the South Carolina flooding was in any way a message from God. “Well, you know,” the octogenarian preacher told the caller, “that’s a mighty fine question ( In other words “I already have a pre-planned answer for this question”). We all know that God’s main weapon of choice for the mass culling of the human race (Since Pat can’t say “All of those damn gay and lesbian people left from Sodom and Gomorrah” on the air) is a flood, so yes, I do think God’s hand is at work in South Carolina (And of course Texas now).” Robertson said that if he lived in the state he’d consider building an ark, like that of Noah, and he’d start putting his and his neighbors pets in the ark, two-by-two.
“I may not have been too sure about the Texas flooding earlier this year,” Robertson told his podcast audience, “but I know for a fact that God was so angry about the Supreme Court’s gay marriage decision (Which absolutely sent Robertson’s last little shred of sanity into a senility overtime mode), that he deliberately waited for almost four months and then flooded South Carolina as a warning to the rest of us.” Robertson says that the “sin of allowing adults to lovingly commit to sharing their lives” with another member of the same gender is “a direct slap in the face to the God (Meaning Robertson was “Pissed as Hell” when Same Sex Marriage was passed so he would now speak for God directly) who sent his only begotten son to come to Earth, not ever get laid (How does Pat know he never got laid?), and hang out almost exclusively with a group of twelve other men who professed a deep, abiding love for him.”(Okay, If you constantly hang out with a group of 12 men, statistics prove there is always 1 in 10 men that are going to be gay……so Pat did the math and got furious).
Mr. Robertson, whose non-profit megachurch has gotten him an estimated $200 million to $1 billion net worth (Of course Pat is conveniently forgetting Mark 10:25 “It is easier for a man to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the Kingdom of God”) , said that he “just feels awful about all the smiting God will be doing” but that “Americans should have listened” to him (Because Robertson is who we all turn to when we want to be chastised by a misogynistic, self-righteous, demented and delusional self created “Prophet of God”) when he warned that this kind of thing could happen if “the court made the egregious and and regrettable decision to treat everyone equally under the law.” (Obviously Pat doesn’t agree with many of the decisions of the U.S. Supreme Court. Robertson chooses to ignore Peter 2: 13-17. 13: Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority; 14: or to governors as sent by him for the punishment of evildoers and the praise of those who do right; 15: For such is the will of God that by doing right you may silence the ignorance of foolish men; 16: [Act] as free men, and do not use your freedom as a covering for evil, but [use it] as bondslaves of God and 17: Honor all men; love the brotherhood, fear God, honor the king.”)
“Repent,” Robertson shouted into the microphone at his listeners, “and all of this will go away. I promise you that if we all got together and voted out the liberals who are poisoning our youth and our culture with their feelings and so-called ‘desires’ to ‘make life better and more fair’ for everyone, not a single tragedy will befall this great nation.”(In the Bible according to Pat Robertson if EVERYONE IN THE UNITED STATES becomes a GOD FEARING CHRISTIAN and we eliminate all other forms of religion and atheism then nothing bad will ever happen in the U.S. again…. NUTS!) Robertson added that “if Americans just completely give over to God’s control, elect a suitable Christian (And we all know that is not DONALD TRUMP, the classic narcissist) and allow that man to craft this country again in God’s will” that “everyone will get richer, there will be peace in the Valley, and literal manna from heaven will drop down for all to feed.” (Okay, this statement was made after Robertson’s private planning session with then candidate Donald Trump, we all saw how well all the people that graduated from Trump University did…..but Robertson did arrange a percentage deal for everyone that Trump leads to Christ!)
“Because while 97% of climate scientists agree that climate change is real and there’s a good chance these megastorms are a result of said climate change,” Robertson said, “we know that the unprovable whims of an even more unproven, all powerful force that controls the universe. And so we must pay homage to that power by telling adults they are not allowed to love whomever they want, no matter how much free will God gave you.” (Of course the word UNPROVABLE is key here. UNPROVABLE is correct. For those that choose to believe in God no matter what their form of religion or what term their religion uses for God that is all good and well, but not PROVABLE. But for those who choose not to believe in an “Unproven God”, that is their choice also. Nobody should be forced to believe either way!)
One thing everyone must admit is that the bible was written by men for men. Once again, just as with female healthcare, no woman was asked for her input of what should be stated in the bible, even if she was divinely inspired. You must take the word of men who say that God spoke to them just because they told you so.
Although my mother was bi-polar/manic depressive her sister was a “paranoid schizophrenic” who constantly heard voices and people who nobody else could see, yet she was deemed crazy! Was she talking to God? Who are we to judge. Growing up in a family with many varieties of psychiatric disorders and being told early on that I had a psychological issue (being homosexual)…..which I never accepted, just be careful who you listen to or ask for advice. I believe that no one should take televangelists word on why catastrophic events happen and if they say “God spoke directly to me” well that is just dandy. But Pat needs to understand that is a message meant for him and his little world.
In the end, after years of shock therapy and being in and out of mental hospitals my aunt was finally helped by new medications developed in the late 1990’s which kept her stable and she is doing well now at the age of 85. Who is to say that the voices she heard were not real? Was she talking to God?
In the end it is up to us to decide who we choose to believe and not believe whether in the bible, koran or any other religions book of worship. And for those who choose not to believe, to me that is their form or religion and nobody has the right to doubt it.
But if need be, now the “LGBTQ Rainmakers” can be called to help out anywhere there is drought on the planet Earth! Just contact me, I’m sure I can pull together a hurricane size group of LGBTQ people.